Wake up
Coffee
Watch Billy Collins on Facebook
Nearly choke on a bullshit pre-workout supplement pill that probably doesn’t do anything but now I think it’s the universe foreshadowing my certain horrific gasping death
Workout: disappointing. Took an online class I thought would be more boxing technique than cardio but it was the opposite and I quit after twenty minutes and just did some push-ups and dips on the side of the couch
A quick shower as my wife assumes I masturbate during every shower and to be fair that’s my only time alone (thanks COVID) but I figure the quicker I bathe the less likely she’ll think that’s what I was doing. Plus I left my phone on the kitchen table, so what was I supposed to watch, my mind?
Breakfast is two scrambled eggs and broccoli because I’m trying
Homeric trip to the grocery store. Everyone was masked but I guess we’re ignoring the one way arrows in the aisles now
Lunch was cleaning out the fridge and freezer to make room for new groceries, so chickpeas, mushrooms, green peppers, tomato sauce and turkey meatballs. There will be farts in an hour
Risked my life changing batteries in emergency hallway lights for the condo board. Perhaps I will die choking and falling at the same time?
Farts
Added to online discussion for class I didn’t realize was due today, and then two comments on other people’s contributions, like I do
Movie trivia online sipping on a new bourbon, Wild Turkey’s Longbranch, a delight
Thin mints in bed with a few more sips of bourbon and Raising Hope on Hulu
Good night
